New Years Resolutions

Here we go for 2009:

Organization!!! We are *fingers crossed* moving this year into the first house we have ever owned. I am going to organzie the crap out of it. We may not be able to afford to fully furnish it, but, I will organize it.

Continued weight loss: I have lost ALMOST 35 pounds since June. Good times. I am not going to set a goal this year, except to be even smaller at the beginning of 2010.

Kids: try not to be so annoyed by them/have more patience. Oh, and blog the cute things they say and do. I am forgetting it all in my old age.

Here is an example:

Ainsley's jeans were too long one day, and they were dragging under her heels. She looked up at me, pointed to her ankles and said,

"mommy, a little help here?"

Wow.

Happy New Year!!!

Stupid Sh*t we did in high school that we thought was hilarious

I have recently gotten in touch with an old friend from high school (and I don't me "old as in OLD" - in fact I am probably older than him), and it got me thinking about some of the funny stuff we did (and mostly it was him...I was just along for the ride).

First of all, keep in mind, my little group of friends was all in the AP/honors classes, so, frankly, we were bored. I remember one night when we were at my house "studying". There were 3 or 4 of us - honestly, I don't remember who all was there, but I am sure my recently reunited friend was there. Let's call him "Bill", after all - that's his name!

We were in pre-calculus (I just had to spell check "calculus"), and we got stuck on some problem. So, we decided to look up our math teacher, Mrs. Pelitier, in the phone book. Yes, kids, that was in the days before cell phones and the internet. Anyhow, we found her, and called the number (and by "we", I mean "Bill"). Her husband answered. Now, honestly, by this point I was laughing so hard that I don't remember what exactly was said - I'm a giggler like that. I suppose "Bill" asked him to speak with his wife, and the husband - in absolute STUPIDITY - told us that she was at the grocery store. Not only that - he told us which store.

Now, you guess what happened next.

That's right - ROAD TRIP!!!! I can't remember which store she was at - probably Food Lion or Tom Thumb. Anyhow, we all piled into a car (probably mine - a rockin' 1985 Toyota Carolla 5 Speed). And then we went to the grocery store.

And we thought it was HILARIOUS!!!!!!

I don't know why we thought it was hilarious. She was there with her kids.

And that was HILARIOUS!!!!

And we asked her a math question.

And that was HILARIOUS!!!!

Then, I think we went to her house and put something on her front porch. I don't remember what,

but I know we thought it was HILARIOUS!!!!

She must have thought we were the biggest pains in the ass, and she probably unlisted her telephone number that night. But, we got our math question answered.

This is just one of my many "Bill" stories. He told me that he read through my blog. Given that this blog is completely fractured and random, and I don't post very often, it is bizarre to think that someone read through it, but he did, and so now he gets a story told about him.

Just think, "Bill", I could have told the story about the time you wore all black to school for several days because of an "issue" with your girlfriend.

That was also hilarious. Sorta.

Or the days you spent selling us candy and then got in trouble for beating the vending machine prices, and costing the school revenue on the vending machines.

Then there were the CO-2 bombs. You know, I prosecuted some high school kids for the same shenanigans. And I thought of you the whole time!!

good times.

Updates and Photos

I finally downloaded some pictures. Here is our life from the last few months:

My in laws visited. Here is my MIL making bread with the kids.



Then my brother in law visited with his wife and my niece, Claire. Here are the three kids:



A few weeks later we took our kids to a nearby farm. Here is Ainsley with a baby pig.



And Brandon with a goat.


And Ainsley riding a pony.


And Brandon riding a pony. (The pony rides were $4 per child, people. I am posting the pictures!)
Then we picked peaches - after all, it was a peach festival.


Then it was Brandon's last day of kindergarten. He got the "milky way" award for most creative and imaginative.
Then the kids all sang/screamed out the lyrics to 4 songs.


And we got a new puppy!!! She's a mastiff - her name is Maya.



Here she is meeting our other dog - Kali. (the stupid, but lovable daschund). Kali wont be the bigger dog for long!(Please ignore my filthy area rug. I didn't realize how dirty it was til I looked at these pictures)

I'm Back

I haven't posted in a while - been busy, what with Christmas, New Years, thyroid surgery, the start of t-ball, moving my office to a new building (20 miles closer to my house!!!!), and watching Big Brother (hey - it is on 3 hours a week!!!)

So, to welcome myself back, I thought I would answer a list of 50 questions forwarded to me by Angel at Emancipation of a Drama Queen. (I would link to her site, but Blogger is a stupid-head, and wont let me do links right now! She is in my blog roll).

By the way, Angel is totally adorable and trying to convince her husband to move to Arizona so that she and I can hang out. : )

Here are the 50 questions:

50 ODD Things about you!

1. Do you like blue cheese? oh yes, especially with a burger or a steak.

2. Have you ever smoked cigars? No, but I like the smell okay. It really doesn't bother me like cigarette or pot smoke does. (not like I know what pot smells like, but, given that it is ILLEGAL, it must smell bad. I wouldn't know. really. okay, but I didn't inhale)

3. Do you own a gun? No - they scare me.

4. What flavor do you add to your drink at sonic? vanilla

5. Do you get nervous before doctor appointments? depends. am I going to have to stand on a scale to be weighed? In that case - yes, scary!!!

6. What do you think of hot dogs? I love hot dogs. Chili dogs (particularly from Sonic) are super yummy!

7. Favorite Christmas movie? Miracle on 34th Street

8. What do you prefer to drink in the morning? Iced Coffee

9. Can you do push ups? uh...the girlie kind with my knees on the ground.

10. Did you marry your High School sweetheart? Which one? Kidding. No...turned out we didn't have all that much in common.

11. What's your favorite piece of jewelry? Wedding rings (I know this is a boring answer, but it's true)

12. Favorite hobby? Napping.

13. Favorite car you ever had? 1991 Saturn that I bought in the summer of 96 with money I had saved up/inherited.

14. Do you have A.D.D.? no. I have the opposite. once I start doing something, it is hard to change gears.

15. What's one trait you hate about yourself? other than my deflated beach ball looking stomach??? I hate that I like to gossip, but, have I got a story for you!! (kidding...)

16. Middle name? Ann

17. Name 3 thoughts at this exact moment? I think I still have some jelly beans left from Easter. I should probably be doing actual work right now. My phone is ringing.

18. Name 3 things you bought yesterday. Iced coffee. Lunch. Gas.

19. Name 3 drinks you regularly drink? duh - Iced coffee, chai tea, Diet Dr Pepper.

20. Current worry? Is Brandelion being bullied at school? should I go to his teacher about this little brat named Travis who keeps pulling his hair?

21. Current hate right now? lack of office supplies in my new office.

22. Favorite place to be? with my husband, just about anywhere.

23. How did you bring in the New Year? With a quiet dinner with my husband in our living room while the kids slept.

24. Where would you like to go? On a honeymoon. still haven't had one. married 7 years.

25. Name four people who will complete this? Who knows.

26. Do you own slippers? not right now.

27. What shirt are you wearing? My favorite pink 3/4 sleeve sweater.

28. Do you like sleeping on satin sheets? No. They remind me of my deceased grandmother.

29. Can you whistle? not really.

30. Favorite color? Purple

31. Would you be a pirate? only if my husband asked really nicely and had a cute outfit for me to wear.

32. What songs do you sing in the shower? Country.

33. Favorite girl's name? Obviously - Ainsley.

34. Favorite boy's name? Obviously - Brandon.

35. What's in your pocket right now? Nothing.

36. Last thing that made you laugh? A crazy police report.

37. Best bed sheets as a child? uhh...I don't really remember. I think I had some flowered ones...and at one point maybe care bears...

38. Worst injury you've ever had? When I was 15 months old I was attacked by a dog and had over 100 stitches in my face. Still have the scars.

39. Do you love where you live? I like it right now. When it is 115 degrees in a couple of months you can check back with me.

40. How many TVs do you have in your house? 2 (and a broken one in the garage)

41. Who is your loudest friend? hmmm...I don't like especially loud people - so not a lot of loud friends.

42. How many dogs do you have? 1 - Kali, a daschaund that still pees on the carpet sometimes. She is stupid, but cute.

43. Does someone have a crush on you? not likely.

44. Do you have a Best friend? I'm not great at the friend thing...I don't stay in touch very well, and I tend to be a home body.

45. What is your favorite book? I think probably the Princess Bride, just because I can read it over and over and it is always good.

46. What is your favorite candy? Any thing with dark chocolate

47. Favorite Sports Team? Texas Longhorns - hook 'em!

48. What song do you want played at your funeral? what ever makes people feel better.

49. What were you doing at 12 a.m.? sleeping.

50. What was the first thing you thought of when you woke up? Was that the dog puking on the floor? (PS - the answer was yes)

Family Portrait

Batman Birthday Party

As the guests arrived, they saw the entrance to the bat cave.

Inside the house were streamers and balloons - lots of yellow and black. You and your friends made Batplanes to fly into the Batcave. Then we went on a hunt outside, and found three villians - Joker, Penguin, and the Riddler. We invited them back to the party, and played pin-the-bat onto Batman.

It was time to open presents - and you all tore in! We went to light the cake - but the Riddler had stolen the candles!! We went on a treasure hunt throughout the house until we found the candles. After the candles were on the cake, and lit - you blew them out before we could even sing Happy Birthday.

You and your friends ate cake and punch, and then went outside to play. You had so much fun!!

I'm Six Now, Mom

Little boy - you are six years old today - and, already you think your whole world has changed.

"I'm six now...I don't have to hold your hand in the street."

"Six year olds go to bed at 8:00, not 7:00"

"Six year olds can have candy whenever they want, mom."

"Mom, when I turn 6 1/2 I'll be in high school."

You are growing so fast, but are a study in contradictions. One minute you can take on the world, and the next you are scared to go to sleep.

This year has changed so much - you are in school now, and doing great. You are everything I hoped you would be - and I am so proud of you! But, don't be in a hurry, little man- take your time with growing up.


I loved watching you with your friends at your birthday. It was so cute - the way you all said "dude" after and before everything else you said. You forgot all about us, and were focused on your friends. You are a sweet, smart, amazing boy - and I am so glad to be your mom.

Happy Halloween!

Here's the slideshow of the kids - they had a great time!

My Baby Girl

You turn three today - baby girl. Even though you still tell me that "i two anna half!" when I ask you how old you are - I know the truth. You are growing up before my eyes. You came into my life quite unexpectedly and continue to surprise me everyday. I LOVE LOVE LOVE having a little girl, and love how we are starting to do girly things together. Here you are - as you turn three:



Sometimes you don't look quite so precious:

But you'll always be my baby

Birthday Slideshow

I'm Thirty Now

I let my thirtieth birthday go by largely unnoticed last month. Maybe that is because I barely noticed it. Life has been coming at me like a freight train lately, and I have been jumping off the tracks just in time to keep from a nervous breakdown.

From the outside, I think it would be hard to understand why I have been coming undone. I am exactly where I wanted to be, but I guess it isn't all it is cracked up to be. I love my job, but it is overwhelming right now. It just doesn't pay quite enough, and that causes me lots of worry. I just thought that after law school I would have no problem making enough money to support a family in a good neighborhood with a quality school. We are there - but, it is not comfortable. I still feel like we are a major car repair or illness away from catastrophe - and that wears on me.

My husband has been going through some medical challenges, and I know it is wearing on him. I think we may be getting closer to getting it solved - but it is not perfect yet, and I think we are both pretty uneasy about it. Out of respect for his privacy, I wont go into more detail, except to say that it is HARD to take care of other people. It doesn't come naturally to me, and it is supposed to. After all, I am a woman, and therefore am supposed to be nurturing. I am going to admit something - I AM NOT GOOD AT THIS. I always feel like I am faking the nurturing. I know sort of what I am supposed to do and say from watching others, but it DOES NOT come naturally. I just keep hoping he gets better, so I don't feel so inept.

I feel like such a work in progress now and I am waiting for that wave of "30-ness" to come over me. I have started to feel more comfortable in my skin. I am also starting to care less and less what other people think of me. But I still feel a sense of being an outsider. When we go to the park, I just feel so different than the other moms. I don't have time to get involved in PTA politics - which is a relief, but also a source of guilt.

Last week at church, the minister described a feeling watching an ambulance. She described seeing a person being put into an ambulance after a car accident. It didn't look too serious, but still, the person was going to the hospital. This inspired in the story teller an odd emotion - jealousy. If only to be taken care of - to go to a room, and have others care for you. To have those worldly responsibilities taken off the table for a while. Of course, she pointed out, being in a hospital is far from restful. But I don't think it is the resting I am jealous of - it is the weight being lifted. The weight of daily responsibilities and obligations. I could use a lift - just for a while.

Then, maybe it will dawn on me that I am thirty and getting wrinkles.

What I did on my summer vacation

I've been gone for a couple of months - taking a little break from blogging. Here are some upcoming posts I would like to write:

• Why my whole family had a mustache at the cabin.

• Brandelion's first day of school - guess who cried?

• I'm twice as busy at work because everyone keeps quitting.

• How to get heat exhaustion by drinking too much water when moving a family of four all by yourself in 110 degree heat (subtitled, how to get your wife to come home early and drive you to the doctor)

I guess I'll leave for now with a couple of shots of Drama Queen who has been quite a trooper through all of the recent changes. I wish I could fall asleep like this!

I guess I don't want to talk about it either

I know I haven't posted in two weeks - geez I feel such shame and guilt. Guess I better give you a funny story to make it up.

Dateline: Living room.

Scene: me sitting on couch, watching TV.

Brandelion: in the restroom right by the living room.

Enter Brandelion, stage left. Fast paced walk, no pants, no underwear. Only wearing a t-shirt.

Me: uh, Brandelion???

Him: (holding hand up in a "talk to the hand" fashion), Don't ask. I don't want to talk about it.

Exit Brandelion, stage right. Bare bottom. Very cute.

I'm not sure what happened in that restroom. He came back out a few minutes afterwards and picked his pants and superman underwear up out of the bathroom and put them in the washer.

Don't ask.

Peace Out,

Working Gal

Total Nonsense Fun

I'm ONE TOP MAMA!!!

Go click on my pic - it'll be fun...


How long do you think I can last???

UPDATE: I lasted less than 24 hours. I guess I am just a legend in my own mind...

Peace Out,

Working Gal

I thought we would outgrow this stuff

As you may know, I work in a huge government office. There is a core group of about 50 attorneys at my level (or just above or below), and we all know each other pretty well. When I first started, I noticed that there was some gossip.

It has been two years.

Turns out there is ALOT of gossip - it just takes a while to build up the trust where people will talk about other people in front of you. Now, if you think about it, that is sort of a sick system. In order to hear the gossip from the "gossiper" you have to prove yourself to be a person that doesn't gossip - at least not to the "wrong" people.

It seems that there is one core group of "cool kids" - and, for the first time in my life, I am marginally a member of that group. This means that I am not sought out by them, but, if I happen to be in a room, and they happen to start gossiping, they wont stop because I am there.

Is this a good thing?

I see pros and cons. It is good to have some of the inside information - knowledge is power - and gossip really can give you insights into people.

However, while I may laugh at jokes and impersonations (because, frankly, we have some seriously funny people), sometimes it goes to far. Then, I feel really shitty afterwards - and wish that I hadn't observed and participated in the whole thing.

It makes me analyze myself a little, and I have realized (over and over in my life...geez, I'm sick of hearing myself whine...) that I have a desire to be included. I am just not sure how to balance that with avoiding becoming a topic of the gossip - "that Working Gal...she sure is stuffy!"

Geez.

Peace Out,

Working Gal

Kindergarten Blues

My baby starts KINDERGARTEN in the fall!!!

Ok, I already knew that, but, last night it really hit me and AtHomeHubby. It made me think back to the first day we had to put Brandelion in daycare when he was eight months old.

We had visited the daycare several times, and we knew he would be fine. I thought I was okay, and the first day I arrived a little early and got him settled in. I headed home to change and get ready to go to work and school, and as I got out of the building

I. Lost. It.

I stood in the parking lot of the daycare BAWLING, and wanting to go back in to get him. I made myself get in the car, and by the time I drove the 10 minutes home I had cried so hard that I had a migraine.

I called in sick to work, and just stayed at home for the day while my baby was at daycare!!!

My mom called me later in the day, thinking I was at work. It turns out that she had sent me flowers at my job because she knew what a tough day it was going to be for me, her baby.

Peace Out,

Working Gal

Mother's Day-Lapalooza

My mother's day:

7:15 AM - ahh...I get to sleep in today!!!! Roll back over... close eyes...

7:16 AM - (Brandelion) MOM!!!! Don't WAKE UP yet!!!! We are making a surprise for you.

7:16 - 7:45 - try to fall back asleep

7:45 watch the last 15 minutes of John McCain on Meet the Press. Geez, he's old! I do love watching a Republican back-peddle.

8:45 - kids and hubby bring me crepes for breakfast. They also bring balloons, and adorable cards and handmade pictures...

9:45 - off to church where the sermon is about Julia Ward Howe and how mother's day started out as a women's peace movement. Here is a part of her Mother's Day Proclamation:

Arise then...women of this day!

Arise, all women who have hearts!

Whether your baptism be of water or of tears!

Say firmly:"We will not have questions answered by irrelevant agencies,

Our husbands will not come to us, reeking with carnage,

For caresses and applause.

Our sons shall not be taken from us to unlearn

All that we have been able to teach them of charity, mercy and patience.

We, the women of one country,

Will be too tender of those of another country

To allow our sons to be trained to injure theirs."

This made me cry and think about how I would feel if Brandelion someday had to serve in war. Would it undo all that I have tried to teach him? And how could I ever send my son to kill the son of another mother?

I know I haven't posted much politically before - but from a purely human perspective - I want this war to stop. Mothers should speak out, and I don't do it often enough.

Peace Out,

Working Gal

The Mixing Bowl Defense

I promised to post about a funny story about me and a bug. The theme over at DraMa's blog is wussy ways you've made other people kill bugs for you. Please keep in mind that we have pest control service at our house every two months. When you live in the desert you have to be worried about poisonous flying things and spiders. Particularity black widows and scorpions. So, to protect the home front - pest control service is a must. At least it is a muss for a big wussy like me.

As my reader(s) know, AtHomeHubby does work a couple of nights a week at a restaurant. About a year ago, he was working at the restaurant, and I was home alone with the kids. I was having a lovely evening, having gotten the kids down to sleep. I was hanging out, watching TV and decided that I needed to get my comfy pajama pants out of the laundry and change into them (don't judge me - yes, I know they were dirty. Dirty is relative).

So, I headed off to our bedroom, and into our bathroom where the laundry hamper is. So far, so good. It was about 8:30 at night, with AtHomeHubby's ETA around 10 or 11 that evening. I went into the bathroom, and picked my pajama pants off the top of the hamper. I changed into them and as I tossed my jeans into the hamper

I

saw

IT sitting on the ground.

And then I freaked. out.

I quickly patted myself down, frantically feeling all over my legs to make sure there wasn't another spider in my newly put on pajama pants. I then got that shiver up and down my spine and screamed a little (the kids were asleep after all).

Then, like the big, brave mama bear that I am, I ran out of the bathroom, out of the bedroom, shut the door behind me, and ran out into the living room. I grabbed my cell phone - jumped in the chair, started crying and rocking myself and dialed AtHomeHubby.

Ring.

Ring.

restaurant chatter in the back ground

Hubby: Hey, babe, what's up?

Me: crying hysterically

Hubby: panic - thinking that something is wrong with the kids. Steph, what is it?

Me: There's a spider

Hubby: relieved and annoyed. Um...Ok

Me: No, really, a big huge, black spider with skinny legs - I think it's a black widow and I am freaking out.

Hubby: You need to kill it.

Me: NO, YOU need to kill it.

Hubby: I'm at work.

Me: Then come home.

Hubby: You're crazy - and need to calm down. Just contain it until I get home. Hon, I've got to go, are you going to be okay?

Me: bottom lip shaking I - I - I guess so....

Hubby: see you soon - you can do it.

So, I started looking around the house for a containment device. I went through the kitchen and found our biggest yellow mixing bowl. I gathered up my courage and crept to the bathroom. Please, God, let it be in the same spot - if it is not there I am going to FREAK OUT even more.

I opened the bedroom door - and went into the bathroom.

IT was STILL THERE!!!

I took a deep breath, raised the ceramic mixing bowl over my head and slammed it down onto the carpet, trapping the black widow!!!!

After the adrenaline surge subsided a little I backed out of the room with a towel and shut the bedroom door.

I then shoved the towel under the crack in the door - JUST IN CASE!

Then I headed back to the living room, and by this time I was SO creepy crawly that I pulled the leather ottoman out into the center of the living room - checked it for bugs, and sat on top of it with my legs crossed - that way nothing could get to me.

AtHomeHubby came home about an hour later and found me there - perched on the ottoman with tear stains down my face.

What a WIMP!!!

Have you ever had jury duty?

I've been in a training seminar all week - focused on jury trials.

Here are some of the high quality tips I've received:

1. Don't face the jury with your arms crossed - it makes them think you're mean, or angry - and, especially if you're a female attorney - bitchy!

I thought it meant - "would you like a cookie?"

2. Jurors are not happy to be there.

No.

Shit.

3. Don't read verbatim from your notes - it's boring.

I think my 5th grade teacher taught me this one. I guess most lawyers aren't "smarter than a 5th grader"

4. Don't wear short skirts.

Like, you mean, Ally McBeal and Legally Blonde aren't real????

And, finally, my favorite tip of all -

5. Don't lie to the judge!

This was in the "prosecutorial ethics" lecture. Gee. Really? Don't. Lie. Hmmmm....I'll have to mull that over for a bit.

Yes, the Government Entity I work for has paid for me to listen to this for the last three days of my life.

My Super Hubby

I just have to say thank you to my beloved AtHomeHubby. He does an amazing job keeping things running on the home front while I am at work. I came home today to two lovely, clean, happy children, a meatloaf and homemade mashed potatoes in the oven, and a spotlessly clean house.

Did I mention that ALL the laundry is done?

I guess I'll have to find a way to thank him for his hard work.

I'm sure he'll have ideas.

I could draw him a bubble bath...

A box of chocolates...

A shoulder rub....

Let me put it this way: he doesn't take baths, doesn't really eat sweets, and I'm a wuss at shoulder rubs.

I'll have to think of something a man would appreciate...

any ideas?

Maybe I'll do the dishes tonight.

Ya' think that'll make him happy?

All this cleanliness begs for something not so clean...

Guess I'll have to use my wildly womanly ways...